HAPPY BIRTHDAY, JULIE ANDREWS!
Dame Julie Andrews was born Julia Elizabeth Wells on October 1, 1935.For over 50 years, Julie Andrews has brought joy to audiences on stage, screen, and television. She continues to entertain new generations through home video and her many books. Happy birthday, Dame Julie! Thanks for inspiring so many of us!
#she is literally the cutest #im blushing
My anaconda will consider it
My anaconda has, upon review of the information presented with it’s partners, decided that it, in fact, does not. My anaconda apologizes for any inconvenience this may cause and thanks you for your time.
Re: Your Anaconda,
Thank you for your consideration. Please keep my cover letter and resume in your files in case of any future openings. Good luck in all future endeavors.
A bunless hun
Cedric Diggory tried to call off the entire Quidditch game and get a re-match when he caught the snitch after Harry fell off his broom
And it was a Hufflepuff who figured out how Sirius was getting into Hogwarts in Prisoner of Azkaban
‘Disguised himself, probably,’ said a Hufflepuff fifth year.
Hufflepuffs are so underrated
Hufflepuffs are the Canadians of Harry Potter.
GIVE ME A TITLE IN MY ASKBOX
- QUEEN/KING OF _____???
- PRINCESS/PRINCE OF _____???
- EMPRESS/EMPEROR OF _____???
- HEIR TO _____???
- GOD/GODDESS OF _____???
- OVERLORD OF _____???
- GUARDIAN/PROTECTOR OF ____???
- THE PATRON SAINT OF ____???
- MASTER/MISTRESS OF ____???
Hands up if large groups of aggressively loud white boys in your vicinity freak you out
One of the things that bonds women, POC, and LGBTQA+ together: The fear of white men in numbers.
Did you mean: Congress?
being a girl is really fucking expensive
hahahahhhAHAHAHAHhahahahahhahahah WHO IS PAYING FOR YOUR DATES
hahahahhhAHAHAHAHhahahahahhahahah WHO IS PAYING FOR OUR TAMPONS, PADS, ULTRA SOUNDS, PAP SMEARS, OB/GYN VISITS, BRAS, CLOTHES, MAKE UP, HAIR PRODUCTS TO GO ON DATES WITH FUCKERS LIKE YOU?
god bless this
i think this person is a wizard
when you don’t compete in the olympics because you want it to be fair
I don’t think Aang is the last airbender.
i’m in love with how the “flip at your own risk” sign pans in dramatically and he does fifty flips in midair right in front of it and sticks the landing pose like “go fuck yourself i do what i want”
all the awards for that comment
“some historians think that michelangelo was drawing god in a human brain. very few people knew what one looked like at the time; but michelangelo had dissected cadavers and would have known. it even has the hint of a brain stem. if true this would have been a great “fuck you” to the pope whom he was not friendly with but also would have meant god was in a human brain, or created by man.”
also michelangelo painted a baby angel flipping off the pope
the blond one, you see his right hand? that’s called the fig and it’s an old world european gesture for ‘fuck you” because apparently Pope Juluis II was a total raging asshole and everyone hated him
but nobody ever noticed this little fucker because the ceiling was so high
and then thirty years later they called michelangelo back to paint the wall behind the altar and he wasted no time in painting the gates of hell behind the pope’s chair
what a badass
It amuses me to this day how much Michelangelo hated his job
wHAt TEaM// ?/?////? ???! !/1?
Friendly reminder that yesterday when my mom took me to Walmart she left me alone in the toilet paper section and this guy started hitting on me and I said “Sorry, I’m a lesbian.” and he was like “Oh my god I’m so sorry I thought you were a boy.”
Soda just spewed out my nose
THAT WAS A PLOT TWIST
Monster drawing on sticky notes by John Kenn Mortensen. He calls it his “little window into a different world, made on office supplies.”
YOU HAVE VANQUISHED ME, MIGHTY BEAST
Cub: DAD STOP
Cub: DAD OH MY GOD
Lion: REMEMBER WHO YOU ARE…
All credit goes to - japharts
This, literally, is dead on exactly how I feel, and probably a lot of you guys too.
if you ever wonder why I’m surprised when you call me your friend or when you say you want to hang out or when you say you miss me